Ever been in a situation where someone did something
you really didn’t like, and you said to them, “Go to hell!”…?
Or, maybe you at least thought it…?
If not, you can skip this article. It is for the rest of us. 😉
Anyhow, here’s the thing… if that person was in the state
of mind to do that terrible thing… maybe they are already
there… in hell… ya know?
Try this: think of some terrible thing that someone has
done that may have elicited this harsh response from you.
Now, imagine yourself in their shoes. How do you think
they might be feeling? Now try to imagine that you are
feeling really good about your life and yourself. Would
it be possible, in this positive state of mind, to do this
terrible thing? Not likely.
It goes back to the NLP presupposition that states:
Everyone is always doing the best they can in any given
moment, given the way their mind works and the state
they are in.
So, by cursing them and telling them to go to hell, you
are trying to condemn them to a place they are already
somewhat at. And, if they stay there, they are likely to
continue with their less-than-loving behavior.
And, it doesn’t do great things for your energy, either.
Instead, challenge yourself to wish salvation for them.
As my friend Kate Nowak says, it is “Better to bless.”
Not just for them – but also for you.
So – when someone is so much in hell that they behave
in an unfavorable way, wish them to “Go to Heaven!”
And send them positive energy to help them get there.
(Just to be clear – in this scenario I mean Heaven as a state
of mind – not the post-death kind…)
Now, admittedly, this might seem a tad challenging. But
hey – that’s true of a lot of things that are worthwhile.
And… perhaps even more challenging than doing this for
others… is doing it for yourself.
How many times have you looked in the mirror (either
literally or figuratively) and wanted to say, “You’re ruining
my life – go to hell!”…?
Obviously, such a curse to yourself is not going to get you
out of the state that got you there in the first place.
Whatever you have done, or not done, that got you to
where you are at the moment you feel like cursing yourself –
you were doing the best you could at that moment. It isn’t
the best you are capable of overall – just the best at that
present time, under those circumstances – both internally
and externally.
Forgive yourself already.
As Einstein said:
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness
that created it.”
So rather than cursing yourself into the “hell” that created
an unpleasant situation, wish yourself to the “Heaven” where
you can lift yourself up to a higher level.
You can even apply this towards yourself when you are feeling
like cursing someone else. Say, “Aha – I feel like cursing
someone else, who must be feeling bad. I must be feeling bad to
want to curse them. Rather than condemning myself, I choose
to wish healing for myself – so I can be in a place to wish healing
for the other person.”
The low road may seem more compelling because it feels familiar
and easier – but the high road always has a much better view.
And if you don’t succeed at this every time, love and forgive
yourself anyway. You’re already getting better at it – more so
than you know.
Brad Yates
Noticias Mentallux 